When I started dating James, I wasn’t sure how this was going to work out. How could I be in love with the Lord, and then also fall in love with James? Was it possible to be both things at the same time?
Despite the seeming paradox, I believed God was calling me to married life, and my first three dates with James suggested I was moving in the right direction.
My new life at home, dating James, was something completely different from the convent. It would take courage and determination to adjust to such radical change:
If I must move forward towards [James]
Towards Christ’s face for me on earth,
Let me move forward with courage.
I wander forward blindly
Towards You, towards Love Himself—
And I wonder what it all means—
Everything a mystery…
(Journal Entry, May 15, 2014)
Where was all of this heading? Where would the Lord lead me next? I wasn’t sure, but I was ready for a new adventure.
The Polish Festival
On Friday, May 23, James invited me to the Saint Mary’s Polish Festival in Orchard Lake. When I arrived, I was surprised by the huge crowd of cars already parked on the festival grounds. Volunteers in bright orange jackets waved me into my designated spot, and then James and I walked together to the front entrance.
Beyond the wire fence, I could see a massive white tent, dozens of vendor booths, and even the outline of a Ferris wheel in the distance. This was no small scale, kiddie tent and hot dog affair.
“Wow,” I turned to James. “It’s so big.”
He gave me a nervous smile. “I looked it up earlier, and there should be plenty of things for us to see and do. The music tent, carnival rides, games…”
The late May evening was hot and humid. I put on my favorite baseball cap to shield my face from the glaring sun.
“Should we go inside the tent first?” I asked.
James agreed, so we entered the relative coolness of the tent.
Inside, more than a hundred people sat at long tables, eating Polish fare and listening to live music. We stood in line to order some Gatorade and the Polish combo: pierogi, kielbasa, sauerkraut, and rye bread. Everything tasted greasy and excellent.
The tent presented challenges to both of us. With his bad ear, James struggled to hear me over the roar of the musicians. At the same time, I fought to stay focused amid the noise and excitement. We were both happy to leave the tent and start exploring the festival.
Once outside, we bought wrist bands for the rides. Next, we ambled through the carnival games: ring-on-the-bottle, guess your weight, basketball, skeeball, and more. As a child, my family almost always passed these games up for the rides.
But James studied the games closely, then started choosing activities to play. I tried my hand at a few, too, but didn’t win anything of consequence. James had moderate success at one of them—a football toss.
“What’s my prize?” he asked the worker.
The gentleman shrugged, then handed him a small Detroit Lions plush. James frowned as he received the minuscule prize.
“That’s it?” he grumbled. He continued scowling as we left the game booth.
“Aren’t you happy you won something?” I said, admiring his new plush.
“I wanted to win something better,” he told me, “for you. Besides, the game was overpriced.”
I suppressed a smile. We were at a carnival: all the games were over-priced. Still, it was nice to see more of James’ personality come out. If we ever did get married someday, I wouldn’t just be marrying kind, sweet, considerate James. I’d be marrying grumpy, disgruntled James, too.
James’ mood soon lifted when we came to the rides. For a school festival, they had a sizeable roller coaster and a colorful ferris wheel. We stood in line for the roller coaster first.
Roller coasters, it turned out, were another thing that James liked. He told me about his favorite rides at Cedar Point and at Six Flags in Virginia. Soon we were sitting on our hats and whizzing through the neon green coaster ourselves.
“Whee!” It felt amazing to be on a roller coaster again, even a small one, just having fun.
Having fun with James Kreger.
Ferris Wheel
After the sun had set, but before nightfall, we headed back to the Ferris wheel. The festival worker gave us a car to ourselves. We slowly ascended as more and more people boarded the ride. Before long, we were sitting at the top.
“Wow,” I murmured in appreciation. “Look at the view.”
The festival was located near Orchard Lake, and surrounded by trees. The view from the top showed the grounds below, lit up with carnival lights. A warm red glow on the western horizon colored the treetops. Above, the first few stars were visible in the twilight.
The effect was magical. And, I realized, rather romantic.
James seemed to think so, too. “Mary, I’ve had such a great time with you these past few weeks.” He looked over at me, above the treetops. On the top of the world.
I had been so afraid at first, to try this dating thing. So afraid, even, to go on this date alone with James.
Now I was with him, alone on the Ferris wheel.
It wasn’t so bad after all.
“You’re so beautiful, Mary.” He said it like he really believed it.
When I was with James, I could believe it, too. I could believe that life was good and filled with hope.
That maybe we could have a future with hope.
I called you home from the mountaintop for this, I heard the Lord whisper.
James looked at me that way again, and this time I saw what might happen next—and I made it happen.
♥️
When I came home to my parent’s house that night, I went to bed sublimely happy.
You sent me home for this, Lord, I thought. And I am so happy You did!
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Thank you so much for reading! Join me next week for more “life after convent” adventures, and some new audio recordings of the blog! 🙂 🔉
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